Tag Archives: Inspiration

Who is in charge?

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Today I received a text message from a client of mine that said, “I just got some very disturbing news at 8:20 am that my nephew committed suicide in my parent’s pool early this morning”. And last month I received a text message from a friend that one of the managers we both knew at a company we had worked for had committed suicide, a young man in his early 30s.

It’s these types of events that strengthen my belief that complexity in social trends is draining the personal power, leaving people feeling powerless and anxious. The Struggles due to social expectations and pressure, bad marriage, finances, or job leave us vulnerable and lead to feeling victimized! The first step in recovery is to understand feeling victimized is a choice. Yes, a choice. The missing ingredient in most cases is the ability to push back on self-loathing thoughts. Take every experience as a learning opportunity and put the outcome to use to moving forward. Let us recognize that feeling secure does not mean to be egotistic, selfish, self-centered, or a bully. It has nothing to do with money, luxury and status. Feeling insecure doesn’t happen suddenly, it happens over a long period of time.

So, how can you reclaim your sense of security and empowerment? Stop giving away your power! You don’t have to please everyone. You don’t have to be what others want you to be. Be who you are. You will accomplish much more as you than as the image what others want you to be. Your feeling of self-worth will increase, and you will start appreciating you, as you are today at this moment. This doesn’t mean you don’t evolve or change, it means you will evolve and change with your set of experiences.

In the quest for self-empowerment we must seek mental adulthood. Our physical being has no choice to grow to adulthood, but psychological adulthood is not given, takes focus and work. How many people have you met in your lifetime that you may have commented ‘boy, he/she is 40 year going on 14’? Adulthood comes slowly, we mature with experiences and as our ability to digest information and process them strengthens over time we develop our core-self. Our core-self is the author of our life story; this idea is opposite of being a victim, who lives a life authored by others. Ask yourself, who’s in charge of my life?

— Shohreh

You can Transform Your Life

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Managing fear is key in achieving successful transformational change in our lives. This includes fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of change, or even fear of fear itself. This is especially true when making bold changes, the kind that could take you to a whole new level of living, or, out of a paralyzing tailspin. The bolder the change, the bigger the fear, as fear is our resistance to change.

So how do you manage deep resistance to big change? Make a deliberate move to alter the direction of your life. This requires managing the present, selectively forgetting the past, and creating a future. To manage the present, you must live in the moment. Be present each and every minute and experience the events as they unfold. Selectively forget the past experiences that have a negative narration such as regret, guilt, and despair. And focus on the future you desire. In doing so you allow your mind to enter the creative zone and have the ability to create the future you deserve.

Shohreh

Inspiration

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“Inspire the world as you’ve inspired me” is the message my daughter wrote on a journal she gave me a couple of years ago. I think about how have I inspired her and what is the gift I can give the world? I can admit that raising my children have taught me to be a leader. 25 years ago when my son was born I felt an overwhelming responsibility that I had to help, guide, raise a child to grow and develop to a happy, healthy, and productive human being. The thought was frightening! How do I do that? I ventured to read a few parenting books, took a few early childhood education class at the local community college and began to understand the nature of learning – a light bulb went on in my head – I need to be a facilitator not a director, guide learning, not controlling the destiny. Well, I have a type A personality; I had the need to control! With the new found revelation I needed to transform myself.

The challenges we face as parents stem from thinking of our children are our possession instead of a gift that are trusted to us to nurture and guide. And the best gift we can give them is the decision making skills. All else will fall into place if they know how to make sound decisions. All the disciplines and rules will not guarantee success and happiness in life, so think about it…next time you are so mad at your child for not following the rules or the direction you gave him, stop and ask yourself how much more valuable lesson it is for him to understand the natural consequences of his actions. Only then he will do the right thing in the future. Fear of you will not help your child to make good decisions; it will push him to hide his actions and/or decisions from you. The question is can you manage your emotions enough to be a facilitator to your child? This takes personal transformation and ability to be centered, control ego, and manage emotions.